Italian Mothers and Italian Mother-In-Laws

As I have embarked on the journey that is motherhood, I have learned some very valuable lessons - like not running over to my kid the minute they fall, otherwise they actually will cry....

Or how very cool ice cream can make potty training sound to a 3 year old...

And even the really important lessons - like what kind of mother I want to be to my sons and daughters when THEY are parents.

You see, I got lucky since my mom is a pretty typical Italian grandma that yells at my kids without any qualms......and I LOVE IT!! Saves me the work, right?!  But I know not all people LOVE that as much as I do.  Will I have to hold myself back when I am a Grandma?  Will I reserve myself with my son's future wife (you know, the wife he will choose from my pre-approved list of my friends' cute daughters) since SHE is the mom and I shouldn't step on her toes?

Yikes! (yes, I just said Yikes, and yes, it is still a cool word)

That is a scary thought.  I am used to being the boss around here, and besides how could ANYONE else step in and raise the flesh of my flesh better than I?  (By that I mean my grandkids, since I'm pretty sure I will still think I know everything when I'm 60)

And what about spoiling my kids?  You know Italian Mothers are known for this one.  It was true for me, but I make my kids do EVERY bit of work they can around here, after all I am the queen of Laziness, remember?!

Well, I have a reader who has her own issues with an ITALIAN MOTHER IN LAW!  Although this mom-in-law may not be trying to raise her kids, she has done a heck of a job raising her Italian son to only be happy with her very own cooking.  This has made it nearly impossible for his non-Italian wife to please his palette!

From what I hear this is the true story with Italian men.  I married an Italian guy - kinda. His DAD is Italian, not his mom, so there wasn't too much competition on that end.  But here is a portion of an email I recently received:

Mamma,

I've read your blog quite a bit, snatching a few minutes here and there. I wanted to contact you privately because something you wrote struck a chord with me.  I'm a non-Italian married to a full-blooded Italian for ten years.  We have six children, four boys and two girls, ranging from age nine down to a two month old. 

  

I was reading your post on your children's birthdays, with all the stipulations your kids like to make for their birthday dinners.  It made me wonder if everybody is like that.  My husband's mother was such a great cook and spoiled him so rotten that I cannot do anything to please him.  Nothing steals my joy so much as seeing him sit down to dinner with the usual disappointed expression on his face.  I'd bake and cook 'till I'd drop, with a kitchen that was a disaster, until I was muttering all the things I'd like to do to him under my breath!  What a life.

 

 I finally decided my health and sanity were more important than trying to cater to him and I gave up on him.  I am so tired of cooking and wearing my patience and health thin.  Now I save time wherever I can, use whatever ingredients I have on hand to put together simple healthy meals, and I TOTALLY ignore my husband!  And I actually can laugh again, enjoy life with my kids, and know what it's like to finally have peace and joy once more.

 

My point is that this isn't a pleasant way to live.  For the sake of your kids' spouses someday, please don't set up a situation in which nobody can compete with a large pot and a big spoon.  There were days I used to sit there staring at the big sauce spoon and the big sauce pot, just hating them because I knew I couldn't compete.  I have since learned that there are things I can't change.  

Our tenth anniversary is coming up and I know we'll go to another fancy Italian restaurant in which the conversation (or monologue) will center around the merits of the various dishes.  Then we will watch Ciao Italia together and I will give him Mary Ann Esposito's latest cookbook as a gift....it's sort of a symbol that I know when to give up and bow out graciously....marriages get a bit crowded when you have to share it with other interests.  I used to try to fight it, but learned that it would be better for me and the kids to learn where my place is. 

 

Please take this in the spirit in which it is sent -- I love your blog and it's really cute, just wanted to mention this.

Signed,

Long time reader, first time commenter

Here was a part of my response:

Ciao! 

Thank you very much for your comments!!  Lucky for me, my husband's mother is not Italian, only his father is.  Also, the Italian cooking is fabulous on my side of the family, not his....and yet I do not even live up to my family's standards!! You see, I am a generation removed from the large families of my great grandparents.  My parents, Aunts, And Uncles did not have a lot of small children running around like I do, and therefore had more time to cook!  You know as well as I do - that cooking is not easy, especially with picky palettes and lots of them!

However, birthdays are the one time I let my children pick their favorite meal and spoil them rotten!! I do NOT cook like this every day - and believe me, whatever I'm cooking is what's for dinner - like it or not!  I am simply too busy to do otherwise!  There is an old Italian saying that says, "Mangiare Cuesta Minestra, O Saltare Cuesta Finestra."  LIterally, it means "Eat this soup or jump out this window!" -  A take it or leave it mentality!  I live by this:)

I understand your frustration and believe that it is not ALWAYS the case with Italian husbands, perhaps often but not always.  Food for Italians is  a memory in and of itself.  SO the food that your husband goes on about is really a memory and a feeling.  It is LOVE for Italians!!  I guess what I am trying to say is that your husband may inadvertently insult you with his disappointment in your lack of Italian cooking, when in actuality he's simply reliving and relishing a memory that is so hard for us Italians to part with.  A smell, a taste or a song is meaningful to all people - it's humanity's way of recognizing familiar things.  For Italians, we recognize much with our stomachs - with our palettes, if you will! I don't know how else to describe it...

How do you describe it?   Am I doing my son a disservice by making him homemade Italian meals that his future non-Italian (yikes!) wife cannot compete with?

 

Ciao!

Homemade Mac and Cheese for the Birthday Girl - with Cake Pops!

Each of my kids gets to pick their dinner of choice on their birthday. This started as a cute and innocent tradition and has since developed into the very cause of my migraines! If there was a parenting course on "How to Teach your Children To Be Demanding Needy Little Tyrants," then I would graduate with honors.

As our kids have gotten older and smarter they now have very detailed stipulations on what exactly their birthday dinner will entail. For instance, my son usually asks for chicken soup. But not just any chicken soup - "the homemade kind, from whole roasted chicken bones, with mini meatballs and pieces of chicken....and the carrots need to be soft...and grated Romano cheese on top - heaping spoonfuls of grated Romano cheese," to be precise.

And then I lovingly smack them with my wooden spoon....I mean........ I give them a kiss and say, "Anything for the Birthday Boy!"

Well, this year my daughter was turning FIVE! Five is a HUGE deal to her since it means school is coming up this year. Also, I have learned a ton of new things about turning five. For instance, (straight from my daughter's mouth) "When you're five you don't take naps anymore." Or "I can ride my scooter in the house cuz I'm five." Everything she wants to do is now suddenly allowed at the age of five. In your dreams, kid.

SO this year the Birthday girl requested homemade macaroni and cheese. VERY cheesy macaroni and cheese with absolutely "NO ham" (here come those stipulations again). And she wanted it to look orange like the box of store bought 'Macaroni and Hydrogenated Oil' (some call it "Macaroni and Cheese"). Well, that wasn't happening because I used a wonderful gourmet blend of cheeses that were predominantly white! Yeah, that did not go over well. But in the end she loved it (and so did we cuz we got our yummy cheese fix) You know how I love my cheese.

So here is a recipe that I altered out of my trusty Betty Crocker cookbook. I switched up some ingredients and ratios and, of course, cheeses. But if you want to pick your own selection of cheese, just stick to the overall amount of cheese and pick cheeses that melt well. For instance, mozzarella would not be a good choice for this!

MACARONI AND CHEESE:

1 lb elbow macaroni

1/4 cup butter

1.4 cup flour

1 -2 tsp salt

black pepper, to taste

1/2 tsp Dijon mustard ( I added a bit more, it really does enhance the flavor!)

1/2 tsp Worcestershire sauce

4 cups milk

3 cups shredded cheeses that melt all creamy-like! (I used white cheddar, swiss, havarti, and asiago)

While the pasta is boiling (I would under cook it by a couple minutes), prepare the sauce as follows:

Melt butter in a saucepan. Stir in the flour, mustard, Worcestershire sauce, salt & pepper. Cook over low heat, stirring constantly until mixture is smooth and lightly bubbly. Stir in milk. Heat to boiling, stirring CONSTANTLY! Boil & stir 1 minute. Turn heat off. Stir in the cheese until melted.

Toss the pasta in the sauce and pout into an un-greased casserole dish. Bake uncovered for 10 - 20 minutes. Here, you have the option of topping it with more cheese or maybe crumbled Ritz crackers or bread crumbs - whatever you like! Buon Appetito!

And Voila! The birthday dinner was a success. We'll pretend this next picture is not of the girls spitting on the Birthday cake ;)

Italian Christmas & Advent Traditions

This is, hands down, my favorite time of year. There are so many great aspects to the Christmas season - good food, good music, and the special traditions that come along with the "reason for the season." I think you all remember how I feel about the commercialization of Christmas!!

Like many Catholics, our "partying" starts with Advent and ends with Epiphany, since our "Holiday Season" is centered around the birth of Christ. Liturgically speaking, Advent marks the "New Year" of the Church, so naturally our family makes a certain "new year resolution" for the four weeks until Christmas. This helps build up the anticipation for celebrating the birth of Christ (And hopefully distracts the kids a bit from their concern with a full stocking or tons of presents!)

So if our family decides to do some extra work of charity for four weeks, or even simply gives up candy - we are all the more excited for Christmas Day when we can eat our favorite junk food again!

We countdown the days of Advent with an Advent Calendar and the Advent Wreath. This usually begins on the First Sunday in Advent and goes all the way until Christmas Eve.

But the first exciting celebration in Advent is St. Nicholas' Feast Day! On the night of December 5th, our kids make sure the stockings are hung for St. Nicholas to fill with goodies. This comes from the historic tale of the real Saint Nicholas, a Bishop, serving the less fortunate. Nicholas' parents died when he was young and left him a great fortune, which he chose to share with others. Not wanting recognition, he would sneakily leave these riches in a family's left out shoes (hence the stockings) or even through and open window or chimney (hence the Santa comin' down the chimney tale). This was his way of helping out those in need but not getting all kinds of glory for it.

This is a great lesson to teach our children of today...helping others without seeking some kind of earthly reward or recognition makes it truly selfless. So on the morning of December 6th, the feast of Saint Nicholas, the kids get to open their stockings full of goodies, small toys and, of course, some chocolate gold coins!

Another "lesson" we teach our kiddos makes use of a long-standing Italian tradition - Il Presipio - the Christmas Crib. Saint Francis of Assisi (yep, an Italian!) is credited with constructing the first Christmas Crib, a replica of the manger to be displayed during the season to recall Jesus' birth. But you won't find the Infant Jesus in our Nativity scene!! After all, He isn't actually "born" yet! Our Presipio includes only Mary, Joseph, and an empty crib, which the children fill with hay each time they do a good deed.

So if my little ones do an extra chore or obey me without a complaint, they get to put a piece of hay in the crib, thus making a more comfortable bed for the Child Jesus come Christmas morning. This is a fabulous reminder of the reason for the season that little minds can understand!

Then there's Christmas Eve - La Vigilia!! The Feast of the Seven Fishes is celebrated by Italians everywhere! Being a "Vigil Day" - (which basically means it is the Eve of a great Feast Day) the Church has long required fasting from meat on this day in order to prepare oneself for the great feast that is coming. Consequently, Italians have more than risen to the occasion with tons of great fish dishes (usually seven to symbolize the seven Sacraments of the Catholic Church). You can read about some great recipes from Dominic Condo and myself from our Seven Fishes Post last year.

Then, of course, CHRISTMAS DAY!! The morning of Christmas, we are all usually pretty exhausted from Midnight Mass - but the kids are excited for their presents from Babbo Natale.

Now, we have a HUGE family an the kids are completely spoiled by all their loving grandparents/aunts/uncles/etc....So My husband and I have chosen to give them only three gifts each from us (reminiscent of the three gifts brought by the Wise Men). They get one special gift and two smaller ones. Any more would frankly spoil them rotten since our extended family spoils them mercilessly already! Oh how I love them for that:)

But before any gifts are opened, the kids - walking in procession led by the youngest - carry the baby Jesus (statue) in and place it in the Manger that they have been filling with hay all Advent long. We are then reminded that Jesus' birth is at the forefront of our Holiday celebrations.

Of course, Christmas Day (and beyond) means a house full of sweet treats and goodies. Struffoli is a festive Italian dessert that my kids love! It's fried balls of dough tossed in honey and sprinkles. You can even use red and green sprinkles to keep it festive!

We also always make a Cornflake Wreath, a kind of Rice Crispy treats. Replace the rice crispies with corn flakes and use green food coloring after you melt the marshmallows. Then place into a bundt cake mold until hardened. When flipped over on to a plate, decorate it with red mini m&ms (to look like holly berries) and a red bow on top. This is what we hand out to our friends and neighbors each year. A Christmas "wreath" that is way too easy not to make!

Our celebrating season comes to an end on January 6th with Epiphany. This is the day the Catholic Church celebrates the coming of the Three Wise Men to the Christmas Crib. So, like any good Italian, we put out our slippers on the Eve of Epiphany (the night of January 5th) for La Befana to fill.

The Story of La Befana is a long standing Italian tradition that my kiddos love! The story goes that this good old Italian "witch" was at home when three men knocked at her door asking directions to the stable where the King was to be born. Engrossed in housework, she neglected to accompany them on their journey and stayed at home to sweep! Later on, feeling remorse, she set out on her own journey trying to find the Newborn King, so that she could leave him a little Birthday gift. Since she was unsure which baby it was, she just left treats for each child she passed, hoping one would end up being the Christ Child! La Befana visits us every Epiphany, and somehow always brings my husband's favorite candy!

These traditions are truly what make the Holiday Season such a memorable time for our family. My husband and I feel it is so important to give our kids these memories to hold on to as they grow older. That way, they learn the true meaning of the season in a fun way, and could even celebrate with their own families one day.

For more explanations and deeper meanings, you can use the links above to reference my original articles on these traditions. Also, you can find my column on ItaliansRUs.com, under "Una Mamma Italiana." Happy Celebrating - and from our famiglia to yours -

Buon Natale!

What's keeping me up at night...

L'uccello mattinieo si becca il verme

In other words, (in ENGLISH words) - "The early bird catches the worm."

Lately, "early bird" is a pretty accurate description of this new mamma. I stay up late at night catching up on my "mamma" duties and barely fit in some sleep before those early morning feedings. Now, you might say this isn't my first rodeo, I should have it down pat by now....but even numero cinque has given me a run for my money!! Don't get me wrong, she is a great baby, but she's definitely taken up some of my blogging time! Now, this could be dangerous since clearly.....

I mean, doesn't everybody? But if it isn't one distraction, it's another, and I'll happily accept any excuse NOT to do housework!

But doesn't it make you wonder how our nonnas did it all? They had a bunch of bambini running around and still made homemade gravy every Sunday and the scratch pasta was hanging to dry (NOT in the upstairs kitchen, of course). And forget about drive-thrus - dinner was on the table every night!

How did they do all that, AND keep the plastic covered couches clean? It boggles my mind. But when I need a little inspiration, I go to them. I think of my grandma who had her stuff together on the home front. I remember her gardening, canning, praying, cleaning, cooking, and playing with her grand kids! After all that, I'd be, um, praying for a vacation and that's about it....

So I thought I'd share a past article about my Nonna - just because. And I guess it's about time I share a pic of my new bambina too!!

Giuliana Carmela

This is what keeps me up all night - but I wouldn't change it for the world:)

Here she wears the baptismal gown, handmade by my Aunt Marie, worn by me and now my four daughters!

Homemade Pasta with the kids!

Every time we have a new baby in the house, we seem to spend much of the first few weeks at home. Coming up with fun at-home activities for the other kids is very important to us. We don't want any jealousy and any parent knows that a kid with nothing to do is NEVER a good thing!

Our last go-around involved homemade pizza. It was a great way to get the older kids involved in something and make them feel special despite a new baby getting all the attention! This time, we went for homemade pasta.

Now, we kind of cheated and busted out the old PASTA-MATIC. It's a dinosaur of a pasta machine from my childhood. I kid you not - it is the actual pasta machine we used to use when I was a kid! Now this circa 1980's hunk of plastic did a pretty good job despite it's age! It was a hit with the kids, because they could see the process or making and shaping a dough into the pasta they are used to eating. We chose rigatoni and spaghetti because, well, what grade-schooler doesn't like playing with long stringy dough? (It had nothing to do with the fact that we lost most of the pieces over the years so these were our only choices...)

Anyway, see for yourself it was a blast! It did the trick of keeping the kids entertained - and we got dinner out of it!! My only complaint was the dough texture & taste was pretty basic. We only followed the whole wheat recipe in the instruction booklet but I am sooo looking for new one!! Anyone with experience in homemade pasta is invited to share their recipe here as a guest post. I would LOVE to find a recipe that I can stick to that actually tastes great too!

Homemade anything is fun to our family!!! We'll definitely give this another shot, and hopefully won't wait for another baby to do so!!

Grandma's Garden - The Next Generation

My March Article for La Voce Newspaper! Just click on the image to enlarge it and read about our version of my Grandma Rose's garden!

Gabriella's Onomastico!

Today marked a popular Feast Day for many Italians - the feast of the Annunciation, or L'Annunciazione!

It's when Catholics remember the Annunciation of the Archangel Gabriel to the Virgin Mary, "announcing" that she would bear the Christ child. In our house, this is a particularly special feast because our daughter's name is Gabriella. Now, the traditional feast of St. Gabriel the Archangel was yesterday, so that was really Gabriella's "Onomastico" or 'name day." (In Italy it is very common to celebrate the feast day of your patron Saint or namesake.) We decided to celebrate today instead for a few reasons:

1. It's Friday night and the sugar buzz will not be so lethal on a non-school night.

2. It is also the anniversary of our other daughter, Gianna's, baptism - or her "Baptismal Birthday" (which we also celebrate every year!)

3. L'Annunciazione is a pretty special feast to just let pass by...

Since our kids were babies, we would celebrate these 'excuses for cake during Lent'........ahem, I mean - special feast days.....to try and teach the kids a little bit about their culture & religion. (we all give up sweets for Lent - it's my husband's way of dieting) Now that the kids are really starting to understand the meaning behind it all, it's tons more fun.

These are the cupcakes that went to school with Gabriella this morning:

When I asked if her class enjoyed them, she paraphrased, "Oh, Mamma - everyone in the class wanted my cupcakes soooo bad. I opened them in the morning and I wanted them all day but I waited until lunch and then Sister handed them out because I would have spilled."

I was looking for a simple, "yes" and "thank you" but hey, that works.

Each little picture is a scene of the Annunciation that I printed off from my computer (in t-2 seconds), cut out, and taped to toothpicks - super simple.

So if you don't do it already, find a way to incorporate these types of feast days into your calendar. It's a terrific way to teach the kids a little something with meaning behind it, and a greaaat excuse for cake:) Cheers!

Happy St. Valentine's Day!

Happy V-Day to all of you folks romancing it up this holiday! While my two older kids are at school passing out the Valentines we spent hours writing out this weekend, we are having our own party here at home! Well, as much of a party as we can have with my two littlest ones being sick (can't you just see the sickness in their eyes in the pic?).

Naturally, candy is just what the doctor ordered, right? Not really. Sugar breaks down the immune system and makes it harder for your body to fight whatever sickness comes our way. My kids already know - "No more candy, mom, cuz I'm sick already and I want to get better fast!" (this usually involves some sort of bribery). This may sound strange - but sometimes I wish they were sick more often - like when it's 9 p.m. on a school night and my husband gets the brilliant idea to bust open the candy jar....I wonder if they would exercise such self control then - "Mom, no more candy..." Wishful thinking.

Anyway, in lieu of the wintery cold and the abundance of sugar this time of year, I have provided a few new "RECIPES" - a couple of old school Italian remedies for the common cold. This is straight from Le Nonne (the grandmothers) I know - so make use of it and avoid all the nasty, medicinal, RECALLED remedies out there today.

And this stuff goes for kids and adults, people! Buona Salute!! (To Good Health!)

GARLIC - garlic is more than just one of may favorite things in the world. It is actually has natural antibiotic characteristics when eaten raw. I've also heard of rubbing garlic infused olive oil on your feet and wrapping them for a few hours. Apparently toxins leave your body through the feet, so that draws out the sickness.

APPLE CIDER VINEGAR - speaking of feet, I have personally soaked my feet (at the onset of sickness) in apple cider vinegar and hot water. You have to get the organic, not brommated ACV. I usually get the Bragg's brand. Bragg's also has a book on all the possible uses for Apple Cider Vinegar as a health fix for so many things. Supposedly drinking water mixed with apple cider vinegar and honey aids digestion and prevents illness when done every day.

GRAPEFRUIT SEED OIL - A few drops of grapefruit seed oil on the tongue is also a cold remedy. This can be found at a local health store or in a "naturals" section of an upscale market. Grapefruit also has natural antibiotic effects.

GINGER- Ginger is always a great fix. Brew some in some hot water with honey and lemon juice and drink it to soothe a sore throat. The natural local honey is best. Normal grocery store honey is often heated to abnormally high temps during processing. High heat, with anything, kills all the essential naturally occurring nutrients, and basically makes any health benefits null and void.

HUMIDIFIERS - Run your humidifier in your kids' room with a couple drops of eucalyptus oil near the steam vent. My humidifier has a spot for this (where they want you to put vicks) but skip the chemicals in the air and us the natural oil. It clears their sinuses just as easily (and smells fresh too).

Have any other health remedies? I would LOVE to hear them! Email me at UnaMamma1@gmail.com or post a comment here. I have plenty more remedies where this came from, but am always eager for more. After all, I'm bound to encounter childhood colds a bit more in my lifetime! Here's to a healthy Spring!

60 years together

Last weekend, my family and I took a trip across the country to visit my dad's side of the family. Great Aunts, Uncles, and cousins came from all over the East coast to celebrate my grandparents' 60th wedding anniversary. I could not resist a post on this.

60 years of wedded bliss is quite an accomplishment - especially these days! My grandparents have always showed our family the example of the love and respect it takes to make it that long. They are beautiful people and we were so grateful to be able to celebrate with them. After all, when Italian families get together - no matter what the occasion - you know there's gonna be good food and good company.

Here's some photos from the experience to share with you. I always say - you know you're Italian when you photograph the food at your party! Che bella!

antipasto!

The happy couple!

My brother, my cousins, and my son posed with me for a picture!

My cousin 'initiated' my son by repeatedly tackling him and then giving him his first wedgie. What an honor....?

My grandfather playing the squeeze box - just like I grew up with.

My daughter found her new BEST friend in my cousin Sean...

Two generations of Pusateri's and Savino's

Uncle Frankie on the accordion...

Congratulations on 60 years

to my wonderful grandparents

Frank and Helen Pusateri.

The Italian "Onomastico" and Shrimp Fra Diavolo

(Shrimp Fra Diavolo)

Friday, July 9, marked the feast day of Saint Maria Goretti, a young Italian saint from Anzio, Italy. The Feast of Saint Maria Goretti is the 'name day' for my "Maria Fiorella!" Also, the day that Maria Goretti received her first Holy Communion is the day after my Maria Fiorella was born! So there's definitely a special connection there!

Being that I am both Italian and Catholic, I am a sucker for all these symbolic things and turn them into a huge festa! (any excuse for a party in the Longo household!) So on feast days such as this, we are celebrating the Saint whose name our children bear, or their "name day." In Italian, this is called the "onomastico" and is largely celebrated even today throughout Italy.

THE STORY OF ST. MARIA GORETTI

She was a poor farm girl, who, when her father passed away of illness, was left with her mother and four siblings to take care of a man's farm. This man's son, Alessandro, would constantly taunt Maria, and one day, when she would not cooperate with his evil ways, he tried to kill her. All the while, Saint Maria Goretti was warning him to stop for fear of the loss of his soul - not caring about her own life. She was terribly injured by his knife wounds, and taken to a nearby hospital where she died.

Maria publicly forgave Alessandro on her deathbed. Later, while in prison, Alessandro had a dream about Maria Goretti handing him some lilies (the symbol of purity) and saying she would pray for him. He began visiting with the local Bishop and eventually repented, spending the rest of his life after his release as a monk. The lessons of purity and forgiveness are ones the world could use a little more of these days! And that's why I chose to name my daughter after her.

LA FESTA!

We celebrated by reading a short story on the life of Saint Maria Goretti to the kids and having cake! Simple as that! It doesn't take much effort, and yet the children will remember the celebration (and hopefully the message of her story) for years to come.

My very sad baking skills were put to the test (again) for The cross cake with what are supposed to be lillies on top!

And whats an Italian Festa without a great Italian meal? We made Shrimp Fra Diavolo which is a spicy red sauce with shrimp and WOW is it spicy!! The trick is to use hot pepper to season not only the shrimp and the sauce, but most importantly - the oil! Hot oil is the BEST way to infuse the dish with the flavors of garlic and hot pepper. Here's my oh-so-simple version of the dish for a quick (and EASY) pasta dish that is sure to impress:

Shrimp Fra Diavolo

(measurements are approximate because I am Italian and therefore learned EVERYTHING I know from my parents or grandparents!)

4 TBSP Extra virgin olive oil

8 cloves minced garlic (adjust this to your liking)

1 TBSP crushed red pepper flakes

1/2 lb. Shrimp, peeled, de-veined, and sliced in half LENGTHWISE *

Already made marinara sauce or 28 oz. can crushed tomatoes**

Heat the e.v.o.o. in a large deep, skillet and saute the minced garlic until slightly golden. Add the crushed red pepper flakes directly into the oil. Toss in the shrimp (seasoned lightly with salt and black pepper) and cook for about a minute on each side (WATCH CLOSELY - this happens fast) until pink in color. DO NOT OVERCOOK!

**NOW: you have two options here. You can either toss this entire mixture (oil and shrimp) into the pre-made (that DOES NOT mean store bought) marinara sauce. I like to use one I made a few days before, and throw it on the stove while I'm cooking the shrimp.....then your sauce is done and ready to serve with your choice of spaghetti or cappellini (my choice).

OR - you can remove the shrimp from the pan, leave the oil on med-low heat and (provided its deep enough) add the can of crushed tomatoes, season with some black pepper and Italian seasoning (or whatever you like). Simmer for 20-30 min and then return the shrimp to the pan. Serve with your favorite spaghetti/angel hair/capellini/spaghettini/etc.

*Cutting the shrimp in half lengthwise ensures that the shrimp does not get too tough after cooking for too long. The smaller pieces of shrimp allow for the shrimp to cook thoroughly without being OVERcooked. And it makes everything bite size!

This is such an EASY way to make a quick shrimp pasta dish. Typically, Fra Diavolo is very spicy so adjust the hot pepper as you prefer. I am somewhat conservative with my seasoning because I am feeding four kids under the age of six. I want to break them in slowly (they are learning to LOVE spicy food) but I don't want to traumatize them either!

So give it a shot and give me your feedback. What adjustments would you make? What thickness of spaghetti is YOUR favorite? Buon Appetito!

My "Great Bambino"

The "GREATEST Bambino" turns six!

Somehow, he got stuck on the angels, much to the coach's disappointment!

(Coach=Dad, Dad= Yankee fan)

So lately little league has taken over our lives!!!! Practices, games, equipment, uniforms.....I can barely stand it, especially since my hubby is the COACH! I've learned through all of this that being the coach's wife has, well, NO perks whatsoever!! I basically got stuck with emailing (often incorrect) game times to all the families. I'm pretty sure that if this was a paying job I would have been fired after the first week. Nonetheless, my pro-bono work has kept me busy, just like my litle slugger...

My son is my husband's protege. That's the nicest way I can put it. You know it's bad when every parent on the bleachers is commenting on how hard the coach is throwing to his son...I would hear things like, "He's so tough on his boy," and "Wow, he doesn't pitch that hard to the other kids!" This is what I get for having an Italian Yankee fan as a husband. (For those of you who can't make the connection - that basically means he is an overly proud father of a 'future major league Yankee shortstop that people just don't know about yet'......yeah, it's that bad).

So after the tough-love coaching style and all the little league games, my son naturally had to have a baseball birthday cake! I'm no baker, but I tried my best. We had a blast celebrating his 6th birthday (and the fact that little league season is over!).

So until next year, I will spend my days painfully watching spring training from my kitchen window. Ahh, the life of a coach's wife......

Il Vero Amore - "true love"

Sometimes this mamma wants to pull her hair out.

Other times I just sit back and smile and realize how in love with my children I am....

Trust me, this is a rare moment and usually only happens when:

a.) they are sleeping peacefully and I stare at them from the doorway

or

b.) I sit down and look at a couple rare and AWESOME pictures of them just being themselves. It is a moment of happiness captured forever and I am such a sucker for it:)

These are the latest moments that remind me what true love is all about:

I am truly blessed.

Life's simple pleasures

One thing about being a Mamma Italiana is that your whole life revolves around the bambini....all you mothers out there know what I'm talking about. After all, motherhood is one of the most selfless jobs there is.

Now, I'm not taking anything away from the job of a father, because that, too, is very selfless (or should be, anyway). The men go to work and support the family and deal with all that stress and then are expected to come home and erase it all from their mind in order to begin their other job - being Dad.

That's a lot of mental exhaustion. I think of my poor husband and the agony he deals with in his less-than-enjoyable, not-worth-the-hours career. It's almost like - is there ever a way out? Will it ever end? I know there's retirement but I can't even see that far down the road at this point. It's almost out of reach right now.

And then I think to myself, WHY am I looking forward to that time in our lives? Aren't the golden years really right NOW, when the kids are so innocent, and still young and cute.....when my husband and I are still young and cute (kinda).

I mean, when we get older, the kids are leaving us, so that's a negative right there. I guess the positive is that I will be quite READY for them to leave by that point, I'm sure. But still - how am I going to handle that? Then we will be old...we won't be able to do all the fun things we enjoy now (but can't do cuz of the kiddos)...our bodies will be a wreck (just thinking of what runs through our Italian blood brings on the feeling of heart failure). My husband and I have already planned our weekend outings - scooting around in our matching 'Rascalls' through Walmart.

Yep, those are the golden years...

Honestly, it's a LOT of work right now trying to find the balance in life. We have four kids. We love them...we would even have more if we could! But boy, do they keep us on our toes!

Sure, things are busy between school and bottles and little league, but I LOVE that kind of busy.

Sure, there's not a lot of time for writing and I would really like to focus on getting a portfolio together...starting my own freelance side job, maybe even write a cookbook one day....

Sure, my husband would rather start his own business instead of work for somebody...he'd like to make his own hours and actually make it on time to the little league games that HE is supposed to be coaching (thank God for the other understanding fathers that fill in).

These things can wait. They will work themselves out.

For now, we have learned to accept (very happily, of course) that things are just a bit busier at this stage. We can't just pick up and go out to dinner without tying three kids' shoes and loading up the diaper bag (of course, we'd also have to win the lottery simply to afford the dinner for six - just another thing on our to-do list)....

We can't start the car and go when we're late for something, cuz we still have to buckle four kids (after the potty breaks, of course). Needless to say, we're late for a lot of things.

But - thank God for good babysitters, because every once in a blue moon, it's nice to get away without the baggage ---literally.

I mean it, not having to lug a diaper bag around on a night out is quite exciting for me! Last weekend my husband and I were lucky enough to go out for our son's school auction dinner. It was so much fun just to get a night out with my hubby. As you might have guessed, I carried the smallest, most lightweight purse I had! What was in it? lipstick! That's it! No diapers, no bottles, no wipes, no neosporin or band-aids - just lipstick!

Thank God for the simple pleasures in life :)

This photo is of me and my husband out on the town! And even without the kids in tow, we were still late! I guess one of the things about getting older is learning that you cannot blame anyone else for your faults...even the kids (darn)

Stay At Home Mom

The phrase "stay at home mom" has had many adaptations through the years. Let's face it, it's even been rephrased into "stay at home dads." Well, I am a "SAHM" in every sense of the phrase, but even more so lately.

Tomorrow will mark the four week birthday of our newest addition, Maria Fiorella, who we affectionately call "baby Mia" or "our little flower." Life has been a filled with an abundance of love and exhaustion lately, neither of which I can complain about considering our little blessing arrived perfectly healthy! We are so excited to have another baby girl in the house, but it HAS made us stay exactly there - in the house!

Outings with three children and a newborn is not on my 'to do list' just yet, so we've been thinking of a lot of "stay at home" activities for our family to enjoy together. This way, the other kids don't feel like they got a raw deal when #4 came along!

Our latest endeavor was a day full of homemade bread and pizza dough. Okay we cheated on the pizza dough and used the bread machine (my new favorite invention, by the way) but it was pretty darn good nonetheless!

We then topped our pizza with some homemade marinara and fresh mozarella. It may have looked like a bunch of kids put it together, but it tasted like a bunch of 100% Italian Nonnas labored over it for hours!

The pizza and the cooking process were equally memorable! See for yourself......

A White Christmas

getting ready for the snow!!! (As you can see in the following pictures, my youngest never made it out there!)

the first of three snowmen that got progressively larger as the snow kept falling!





look at that - at least 10 inches!

Anyone from Vegas knows snow is a RARITY.....but last week it snowed twice! We live closer to the mountains so we got about 8 or 10 inches and it's still here! I know it has nothing to do with la bella italia, but I thought I'd share our snowy photos with you all!

Plus it's pretty funny thinking about how my husband's ride home from work consisted of getting snuck in the snow and rolling on the ice!!! Then, he had to park his car down the street and walk home because it wouldn't make it up the hill!!! Poor guy...he loved it though! Now we have the story to tell our kids when times are tough - "Hey, kids, you think life is hard? We had to walk uphill in the snow, barefoot!"

Okay maybe not barefoot, but it makes the story sound better right?

Well, I hope wherever you are your families enjoy a wonderful Christmas - white or not!

I know our Christmas will be full of family, fun, and food!! So, I will definitely follow up with recipes and pictures after the holidays! Until then,

Buon Natale e Felice Anno Nuovo !